“I’m at an all time low,” Larry says as he moves across the bedroom, tucking his shirt into his jeans. “Everything is loose.” I’m leaning against a soft euro pillow, sipping lukewarm coffee, listening to a Krista Tippett interview, reading a few pieces from Dancing Naked in Fuzzy Red Slippers, when my attitude takes a sudden plunge. I look up, give Larry the once over, he looks the same. Moving towards me for a good-bye kiss he says, “A few more pounds and I’ll be at my goal.” He probably didn’t notice my glare. 

He’s gone, the cat’s gone, my attitude is gone, and now I’m starving. What the hell? I get up, waddle to the kitchen in search of chocolate, cold steak, old burritos, I have no standards. I grab a fork, open those stainless steal double doors, mouth watering, ready to plunge. All I see is chicken? 

Then I remember…we’ve had quite on chicken lately. I brought some mystery meat up to the lake last week, indistinguishable, frozen in the marinating sauce. When we got to the lake we discovered the mystery meat was indeed chicken. I already bought chicken for our Father’s Day barbecue on Sunday, Kelley cooked it perfectly, but we have enough leftovers for the rest of the week. And there are several chicken burritos left over from Dante’s birthday. I’m trying to decide if we should have chicken frijatas or chicken salad tonight. I think I just figured out why Larry is losing weight. 

I search the freezer and cupboards for chocolate. I forget where I hid my stash. That might be the one advantage of old age, but in emergencies like this, memory is essential. I consider the wedding cake in the outside fridge from my daughters wedding three years ago but it doesn’t appeal. I know I left a note about where I hid the chocolate on my iPhone. I switch into search mode but you can bet it will be the last place I look. I find it under a pile of blankets near the foot of my bed. It’s dead. I see the pattern, but refrain from writing it down, because you know what I’m thinking.

Eureka! I found it. I hid it. I ate it. A real Oprah moment. A bag of chocolate kisses stashed behind the bible in my bookcase. I think it’s kinda biblical. I decided to change my goal weight for the summer. Three months from now I will thank myself. My new goal weight is to get out of bed without rocking myself to create momentum. I left a note on my iphone next to the one entitled Hidden Treasures? Now that I am well below my goal weight, I crawl back into bed, hit the play button on my Krista interview, pick up my book with the red feather, and resume. 

Any goals this summer? Let’s write them down 🙂

You might also enjoy: Dress for the Weather or Middle-age Penance

Thank you Donna Corbin for the above note! 


Leave a Comment

  1. Again… you make me laugh at myself with your observations about life as a 50 something with a few pounds listed on the summer \”to do\” list. Love the quote and love you forever. Time to share a glass of wine.


  2. Hi Sue. A glass of wine is definitely in our future, we have much to catch up on, and I'm missing the sound of your laugh! I'm home all next week, pick a night, I have no viable plans. Thanks for reading :))


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